Tuesday, February 24, 2009
The Break Up
A few months ago I knew AJ wasn't the one for me. Maybe because within 2 months of dating we had a huge argument and the argument continued for oh I'll say the rest of our relationship. Yes some days we're wonderful, others were horrible. I "acted" like I was happy and that he was the one I was to marry. We treated each other so bad. I think we both treated each other without respect because I was constantly questioned why I wore a tank top, specifically what I did, who I talked to, if a guy looked at me, where I was, etc. You get the point right? So while he did was asking me all these questions I did the same back to him, Distance took it's toll and I told him back in October I couldn't deal with it anymore. I was too stressed out to hav a relationship so many miles away. When we were together things were great. We loved each others company. But everything was ALWAYS his way or no way at all. He convinced me to try to have a relationship with him again sometime in November.
For my birthday/Christmas he got us this devotional book about Respect & Love. (sorry I don't remember the title) We read a few chapters but then I stopped reading it because things were going back to how they were. I couldn't deal with why he was questioning why I went to church. For one things don't question me about that. You have crossed the line buddy! That was actually said before the devotional book came into play but thats just a few things he questioned me on. So when I stopped reading he says things got worse and it was all my fault. So just a few weeks ago I ended it for good.
Since not being together of course he wanted me to start and finish the book again. He also wanted me to let him know in a week if I had a change of heart but I haven't. And honestly, I haven't missed him either. Is that bad for being with him for almost 2 years?
I've moved on with my life and have since met someone else. We're just friends so don't freak out on me. I also have started a Bible study with a few girls on Monday nights. I'm reading Esther by Beth Moore. It's my first Bible study and I'm enjoying it so much. I've grown a lot closer to Christ and it's be noticed! I was so excited to hear my brother Josh ask me what was different about me! I hugged him and said I have Jesus with me! Let me tell you how big our smiles were on our faces.
It's so wonderful and amazing to see how God is working in my life. And I pray everyday that God will put my prince charming in my life. But I'm in no hurry to get married, although all the people I've been around are married with kids.
I'm such a happy young lady now and I can't wait to see what God has for my future!